Tuesday, September 2, 2014

Last Trips: Take Pictures, because you never know ...

I was talking to Grandmary on Sunday night, as I do --

Aside: The 'rents and I have a standing 9pm Sunday night phone call -- a custom that has dated back to the college days when there was no such thing as e-mail, blogs, FaceBook, or other things with which to keep track of far-flung family. They actually have standing Sunday phone call checks-in with all of their off-spring. Sometimes the schedule works. Sometimes it's a FaceTime or a Skype call. Sometimes the call with with the maternal one. Sometimes the paternal one. Sometimes, woe be unto you for calling during a SportsBall Evening. Sometimes the parental unit is chatty; other times, one gets the impressions that they ... rather not be talking to you at all, and you feel rushed off the phone. Sometimes you are on a speaker-phone conversation and you don't know it. (AWKWARD!) Sometimes it's a tag-team production because nature has called unto the bladder of people on either end of the call. So -- you know... The usual. It's a family thing.


and we were conversing about this, that, and the other thing.

I haven't mentioned it here (yet), but Grandmary and Grumpa Max will be leaving soon for a year-long religious service mission in Washington, D.C. The application, acceptance, and organization of this mission has been a longer more drawn-out process than they anticipated, for reasons that have only been revealed, as we say: "in the fullness of time."

Apparently HE knew things that we could only begin to realize, and it was important that Grumpa, particularly, be around this year for his extended family. Sadly, some grand old broads, my great-aunts on my father's side passed away this year. (I will blog about that soon.) It was important that Grumpa be available to travel to the funerals, which he might not have been if he were in D.C.

Given the age of my maternal great-aunts, and the fact that my parents will be on the East Coast, we have also been worried about my northern-Utah great-aunties. Mom has been doing trips to Logan, Utah a lot this year to check in with them.

But, apparently, we also should have been keeping tabs on the North Carolina relatives.

[But Nettie? How's all this relevant? I'm getting there.]

I asked Grandmary on Sunday, after listening to her rattle off the names all the family and friends that had gathered for their "farewell" ceremonies, if anyone had taken pictures. My brother Jed, wife Kelli, Drew, and the twins were there; my father's sister, my aunt Cora and uncle Kevin were there; some of my father's California cousins had come in; and lots of CT and UT friends were there ...

But no one took pictures.

When Grandmary was last in Logan, "because you just never know" ... she didn't take pictures.

[UPDATED LATE TODAY because of an email from Grandmary:

I did too!
I did too take pictures in Logan. No pictures on Sunday, but we were all too busy keeping track of Sarah and Cannon.

With four pictures of the aunties from the Logan trip. I stand corrected. Sarah and Cannon are two times the mischief and go tearing off in either direction with chortles of devilish glee.]

It wasn't until the conversation was beginning to wrap up, that Grandmary just happened to mention:
one of my last photos of Ms. Lucille, as I was getting in the car

"Oh, and Lucille died."

Turns out -- Ms. Lucille (in the respectful parlance of the South) passed about a month ago, but we just found out. The North Carolina family tree is large and extended and full of many, many branches, and sometimes ... it's hard to stay in touch if you aren't in the immediate family.

With this news, the sense that more time is passing and I'm losing more connections to my grandmother(s). Though, their presences have both been very close this summer. (More on that later).

Immediately, I flashed back to the North Carolina 2010 Roadtrip with Grandmary (most memorable for the e coli I picked up on the last leg), and how I am SO GLAD THAT I TOOK PICTURES.

I have documentation of the last time I saw Ms. Lucille, who was family, and should/could have been considered another one of my honorary aunties.

Grandma Ollie and Ms. Lucille were long-time friends AND family, cousins through the Aycock line, hearty North Carolina farm wives, church companions, quilting circle ladies, and a comfort to each other through long widow-hoods. While I didn't get to spend much time with her, I am so grateful to her for all that she did for Grandma Ollie, especially during Ollie's last years - even when it was hard for Lucille to communicate (she got so deaf, the poor dear), and for her gracious Southern hospitality for the long traditionally Southern slooooooow "rock and talks."

I am particularly glad I TOOK PICTURES of the last time I ever got to visit back in 2010.
Grandmary showing off family pictures to Ms. Lucille

 Some of Ms. Lucille's farm

TAKE PICTURES.
LOVE YOUR RELATIVES.
STAY IN TOUCH WITH YOUR RELATIVES
TAKE NOTES!
REACH OUT TO YOUR RELATIVES

because ...
YOU NEVER KNOW!

Time flies and life, even after 95 years! ... is too short.

Obits - for genealogical purposes
(Grandma Ollie had scrapbooks of newspaper clippings of obits. I have a blog/book archives.)

Goldsboro Daily News (N.C.), July 23, 2014
Lucille Gordon Aycock
July 23, 95, Fremont
Lucille Aycock

Lucille Gordon Aycock, 95, 1058 Aycock Dairy Road died, Wednesday night at Kitty Askins with her family by her side.

Funeral, Friday 11:00 AM, Simon Aycock Cemetery, 1022 Aycock Dairy Road, Fremont.

Family will receive friends at the resident Thursday from 4:00 PM to 8:00 PM and following the committal service.
Mrs. Aycock is a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. A native of Wayne County and was preceded in death by her husband, Raymond Charles Aycock, Sr., a son, Larry Steven Aycock, her parents, Azzie Belle Barden Aycock and Ralph Gordon Aycock, brothers, Elton Aycock, Hubert Aycock, Wilton Aycock and Elbert Aycock, and grandson, Charles William Aycock.

Surviving, four sons; R. Charles Aycock, Jr. (Mary Ann) of Pikeville, Allen Glenn Aycock, Sr. (Jan), Phillip B. Aycock (Nanette) both of Fremont and Roger S. Aycock (Josephine) of Roper. Grandchildren; Connie Johnson (Jimmy), Russell Aycock (Paula), Brad Aycock (Kristi), Melissa Dobbs (Steve), Marie Littleton (Ken), Glenn Aycock, Jr., Julie Johnston (Jay), Suzanne Aycock, Jennie Ledford (Marty), Missie Brady (Chris), Molly Oliver (Chris), Phil Aycock (Veronica), Nancy Corbett (Mark) and Ryan Aycock (Amanda). Great-grandchildren; Hannah Aycock, Heather Johnson, Paige Johnson, Ethan Aycock, Rusty Aycock, Olivia Aycock, Sarah Aycock, Mitch Hurlburt, Stephanie Hurlburt, Megan Littleton, Garrett Littleton, Nathan Littleton, Sara Aycock, Elizabeth Aycock, Hunter Ledford, Fischer Ledford, Christine Oliver, Porter Brady, Katie Brady, Bella Oliver, Jacob Oliver, Wyatt Aycock, Wade Aycock, D. J. Terrell and Gwyneth Terrell

Published in Obituaries on July 24, 2014 1:48 PM 
LUCILLE GORDON AYCOCK
Jan. 13, 1919-July 23, 2014
Lucille Gordon Aycock, 95, 1058 Aycock Dairy Road, Fremont, died Wednesday night at Kitty Askins with her family by her side.

Funeral Friday 11 a.m. Simon Aycock Cemetery, 1022 Aycock Dairy Road, Fremont.

Family will receive friends at the residence Thursday from 4 to 8 p.m. and following the committal service.
Mrs. Aycock was a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

A native of Wayne County, she was preceded in death by her husband, Raymond Charles Aycock Sr.; a son, Larry Steven Aycock; her parents, Azzie Belle Barden Aycock and Ralph Gordon Aycock; and brothers, Elton Aycock, Hubert Aycock, Wilton Aycock and Elbert Aycock.

Surviving four sons, R. Charles Aycock Jr. (Mary Ann) of Pikeville, Allen Glenn Aycock (Jan) and Phillip B. Aycock (Nannette) both of Fremont and Roger S. Aycock (Josephine) of Roper; 13 grandchildren; and 24 great-grandchildren.

Memorials may be made to Kitty Askins Hospice Center.

Arrangements are by Evergreen Funeral Home of Goldsboro, and condolences may be made through www.evergreenmemorialservice.com.
(Pd)

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