If the snow doesn't kill you ...

It was an epic struggle to get to work today. We’re in the midst of a three day snow event, which someone called a snow-hurricane. First there was rain, then there was sleet, then there was wet heavy snow … combined with the howling winds, blowing everything this way and that. And it's not going to be over for another 12-24 hours. It’s beautiful – when viewed from the warm, dry side of the window, secure in the knowledge that you don’t have to shovel or go trudging through slush piles that are up to your knees. Sadly, that wasn’t me today. I had to go to work.

The Big J is a college conservatory. There are auditions scheduled every day for the next ten days. Audition week here is like the Olympics of music, dance, and drama. These kids work for years for their chance to try out, and then pass through layers of qualifiers, just to get admitted. Some people travel in from around the world just to audition. It’s a big deal for the students and their families, and the school will not deny them the chance. Thus, we are open – regardless if we are working auditions – which, luckily, I do not! (Sorry readers, you can’t bribe me for help getting in.) Repeated checking of the cell phone and the main number to the office crushed my hopes for another blessed snow day this month. Plus, I had an application that had to be filed by today. Phooey.

The newscasters warned me of 20-90 minute delays on my trains. I knew it was going to be bad. I thought I was prepared for it. The 35 minute wait on the platform wouldn’t have been so awful, if my feet weren’t soaking wet from the puddles I had to splash through to get to the station. Then the commute was a 45 minute standing room only experience, ala the Tokyo Subway. It would have been bearable if I wasn’t smooshed into a human pretzel. I want to learn yoga, but even trained yogis would have been hard-pressed to find the zen in the mass of bodies that was the train this morning. At one point, one of my shoulders was in some guy’s armpit, and my other shoulder was in between some lady’s shoulder blades. (I hope they were her shoulder blades.) I had an elbow in my kidney for a while, plus my knees and hips were canted in different directions. A chiropractor would have a field day with me right now. Oh, and that’s not all. I was in the vestibule on a local train as people were jostling to get on and OFF. It was a LONG, miserable, achy, ride. Needless to say, I got to work very cold and cranky.

As the day progressed, and the snows fell, those of us in the office got a little punchy. It could have been the exchanging of the “war stories” (my commute was sooooooo bad), or the very casual nature of the various clothing ensembles, but our conversational topics began to get decidedly odd. Somehow it turned to current events (like this and that) and this gem was uttered:

Me: Well, they are called killer whales for a reason.
Boss: I bet cows kill more people per year than killer whales do!

Me: (*beat*) hysterical laughter*

Then my Boss LOOKED UP THE STATISTICS, proving once again that you can find anything on the Internet.

Moral of the story?

Really? You want one?

This entry is about snow, trains, killer whales, and cows, for cripes sake!

Is it spring yet?


*** I do extend my deepest sympathies to the family and friends of the SeaWorld trainer, of course. I'm not trying to be disrespectful to her memory at all.