43 Ideas for Birthday 43: Cameras

I've actually posted this already, so I'm going to extract and reblog from July 2013. Models may now vary, but the idea is there.

I would like to upgrade my camera. Like seriously upgrade my point and shoot to a lightweight DSLR upgrade.

Or even move up the tech curve to something like this?

Panasonic's new Lumix is a serious camera with an automatic selfie mode http://t.co/r5wGSSsrtH pic.twitter.com/Hnwa9stEmk
— WIRED (@WIRED) January 21, 2015

Here's the original post, so you can see all my babbling: 
http://auntienettiesattic.blogspot.com/2013/07/dreaming-out-loud-photographer.html

Here's an excerpt:

I have other funding priorities, like:
- paying the rent,
- paying the bills,
- paying off my graduate school student loans and other debts,
- affording trips to see the family and/or far-flung friends, and
- living in one of the most expensive areas in the country ...

And ... "write" now, this is just a hobby for me. I'm not the type of blogger who has sponsors sending her all over the country, or a semi/full-time photographer who takes pictures that are licensed for use elsewhere or used to make prints, cards, etc. that are sold through her etsy.com store, or as a (fill in the blank)

So...

I can't see spending the equivalent of upwards of 1 to 3 months worth of rent money on a piece of equipment for a HOBBY, even if it was an investment to move that hobby into a money-making venture. I am serious: 1-3 months of a NYC-adjacent studio apartment (studio even) rent, for a new DSLR BODY. If you add on lenses and flash packs and batteries and other accessories ... It adds up. Even checking out the used sections of camera stores like B&H Photo and Video in NYC (where all the following photos come from, except where noted), finds that used cameras cost almost a month's rent.

Thus, I'm Dreaming Out Loud.

I would love a DSLR - but they are so large, heavy, expensive,

and then they have various lenses that are also large, heavy, and expensive.

Most come in a generic black color, which is fine for most people, especially New Yorkers, 

but look! Some come in this pretty blue. 

I really love blue.

And then some of the DLSRs need external flash packs, 

which is MORE money and stuff to lug around.

So let's be practical, these can get heavy and when you are already schlepping around, you want something lightweight to sling around your neck.

This Canon EOS Rebel SL1 Digital SLR Camera is new to the market, and is supposed to weigh in under a pound, before battery weight, and is smaller and less bulky. The price seems about on par for other smaller DSLRs on the market. With an existing flash plus mounts for more, hand grip, auto functions plus some manual ones, ability to switch out lenses, and both the traditional eye view-finder and digital screen, ... it's where I'd like to go on a camera, eventually.

From the Press Release photo kit

One day.

Dreaming Out Loud - Photographer Phantasies

Image from here

Given last month's installment of Dreaming Out Loud re: my phobia of being photographed, not to mention my track record with cameras, this month's installment might seem strange to those people who are acquainted my oh-so-Graceful self. But, this is a Dream List, so I am putting this out there.

Stranger things have happened -- especially lately.

The whole area of photography has changed dramatically since I was a child. I grew up in an age when pictures were still taken with film and printed on photographic paper. The cost of the film, processing and printing it was what kept too many people from venturing beyond family, vacation, and holiday pictures. It was expensively prohibitive to start "experimenting" with artsy shots, and you weren't always sure WHAT you were going to get on film until it came back from the processors.

Now, growing up with a father who worked in the audio-visual medium, it is only natural that we kids gradually took an interest in photography. (But given the fact that we're all a little competitive ... it's better than some of us haven't really pushed to make a profession out of it.)

I still have prints from my high school pin-hole camera experiments. I actually miss the smell of the dark room and the chemicals. I miss having the knack of loading my film in a camera, by winding it manually onto the gears, or hearing the whirr of the automatic winding process. Until a few years ago, I had canisters of super old, probably expired and exposed, black and white film in my fridge, and I still can't give up my hard-earned, vintage third-hand, battered film Pentax and equipment. They are buried behind things by my desk in the Attic, but I can get to them in a hurry. It may be one of the five things I grab in the case of an emergency.

Digital photography has opened a whole new world of possibilities. There are cameras ON PHONES! Something that not more than 10 years ago would have been unimaginable. That those phones take better pictures than some of my old 35mm cameras? Even more remarkable. (Has the ease of digital cellphone photography made some people go too far? Yes. HELL YES. See any starlet with a scandal lately. And the selfie craze? ... Really people!)

I tend to stay behind the technology curve, due to an abundance of caution and a lack of funds. But once I did officially, finally, switch to digital point-and-shoots? Sometimes I have to remind myself that some of my shots are actually pretty good.* (Again, read over-saturation of images, everywhere, all the time, by all kinds of amazing friends and family, and inadequacy and competitive issues).

I would love to move beyond a point-and-shoot and see what else I could do when I was the one in charge again, and not using the albeit wonderful settings.

But ... I have a mixed success rate with keeping cameras in my hands. Two recent cases in point:
 

Nikon Coolpix 

2007-2011 RIP

Ms. Ruby Nikon 2.0 

2011-2012, RIP

And ... I have other funding priorities, like:
- paying the rent,
- paying the bills,
- paying off my graduate school student loans and other debts,
- affording trips to see the family and/or far-flung friends, and
- living in one of the most expensive areas in the country ...

And ... "write" now, this is just a hobby for me. I'm not the type of blogger who has sponsors sending her all over the country, or a semi/full-time photographer who takes pictures that are licensed for use elsewhere or used to make prints, cards, etc. that are sold through her etsy.com store, or as a (fill in the blank)

So...

I can't see spending the equivalent of upwards of 1 to 3 months worth of rent money on a piece of equipment for a HOBBY, even if it was an investment to move that hobby into a money-making venture. I am serious: 1-3 months of a NYC-adjacent studio apartment (studio even) rent, for a new DSLR BODY. If you add on lenses and flash packs and batteries and other accessories ... It adds up. Even checking out the used sections of camera stores like B&H Photo and Video in NYC (where all the following photos come from, except where noted), finds that used cameras cost almost a month's rent.

Thus, I'm Dreaming Out Loud.

I would love a DSLR - but they are so large, heavy, expensive,

and then they have various lenses that are also large, heavy, and expensive.

Most come in a generic black color, which is fine for most people, especially New Yorkers, 

but look! Some come in this pretty blue. 

I really love blue.

And then some of the DLSRs need external flash packs, 

which is MORE money and stuff to lug around.

So let's be practical, these can get heavy and when you are already schlepping around, you want something lightweight to sling around your neck.

This Canon EOS Rebel SL1 Digital SLR Camera is new to the market, and is supposed to weigh in under a pound, before battery weight, and is smaller and less bulky. The price seems about on par for other smaller DSLRs on the market. With an existing flash plus mounts for more, hand grip, auto functions plus some manual ones, ability to switch out lenses, and both the traditional eye view-finder and digital screen, ... it's where I'd like to go on a camera, eventually.

From the Press Release photo kit

One day.

You know, since I'm Dreaming Out Loud and all.

By the time I save up - something smaller, faster, lightweight, and most importantly, DROP RESISTANT will be on the market.


*Thus, some of this week's upcoming Photo Flashbacks.

Dreaming Out Loud - Camera Shy

Image from here

I used to think the whole concept of The Secret and vision boards was a bunch of new-agey hippy hooey.

I don't know if it's a WASP thing, or a family thing, or a generational thing, or even a "chick" thing, but the whole concept of
a) not appreciating what I already had/have, or
b) asking for anything, or
c) putting into words and/or putting "out there" the fears/desires/what-have-you, or
d) some combination of the above
is kind of a strange thing for me. I mean, other people have absolutely NO problem stepping out, stepping up, and practically SCREAMING to the world what they want, or think they are entitled to receive. Not me. I have to practically have a breakdown before I even admit I need help at work, for goodness sake.  (Um, please bosses? I need staff ... Please and thank you.)

Maybe it's an introvert thing?

Buckets at NRS HQ

I don't know. What I do know, however, is that I'm slowly, very very slowly, beginning to feel comfortable expressing a desire for some of the "extra," non-essential, seemingly silly things that I would like to come into my life. Instead of a "bucket" list - I've decided to Dream Out Loud. 

I know this is working. Case in point ... my need for the seashore. Voila. Day trip to the beach earlier this year, with some of the nicest friends, conditions, and lighting imaginable.

Also, months ago, in a draft of a document that is the ongoing draft of these posts, I entered a couple of notes about travel ... and out of the blue, things are starting to percolate.  But, really, NO ONE knew about things on that list - and suddenly I'm getting text messages that start with:

Do you have a current passport?

More on that later. But, given that, it's hard not to believe in this concept of Dreaming Out Loud.


So THIS post is about one of my biggest issues. Being "camera-shy" - cause *that's* what we'll call it - though it's not really about the camera.

These innocuous things ...

I have an almost pathological fear of being in front of them. Stemming from tweenhood. Body issues. Body dysmorphia. Yada yada yada. Whatever ... I know. But it's bad. Really, really bad.

On a tour of NRS HQ with J in January, we walked into the catalog shoot room. Just seeing these:

started a round of nausea, inappropriate joking, and kicked my fight or flight instinct into high gear.

Don't even get me started on Skype sessions with my family.

I loathe and despise having my picture taken, being on camera, being on film, or digitally captured. I'm trying to be better about it, because there does need to be a record that I was around. Thus the inclusion, over the last few years, of actual pictures of me on this blog and monthly sessions on Skype and FaceTime.

But ...

But ...

J & Christina's "wall"

But if we are being honest: here's the real reason for this month's dream. At my parents' house, there is the "wall." You know the wall. Most families have them like this. The one with the family portraits. The engagement shots. The wedding pictures. The school photos. The family pictures from milestones like reunions, christenings, etc.

Yeah, that wall.

I'm in a few shots of things from over the years. I had to be.

But the only portrait of me is from my college graduation. Almost 20 years ago.

Don't get me wrong. It is, and was, surprisingly, a semi-decent shot. Especially for a yearbook photo that I took with my teeth gritted behind a Mona Lisa smile.

But it's 20 years old.

Aside from my drivers license and passport photos, that's the only portrait of me that exists.

That probably should be rectified. I'm not that girl anymore. (And it wouldn't be helpful in emergency situations.)

But, you remember my little phobia of photos featuring me?

I'm trying not to pass on my issues to the next generation. The kids are not self-conscious; they are adorable and telegenic. They are also growing up with cameras pointed at them almost 24/7.

Me? I see a camera and freeze. And then unfreeze and get totally awkward. Given our society these days, I'm awkward all.the.time ... EVERYWHERE.

So my entry for this entry of Dreaming Out Loud is for help on this issue.

I need to learn how to pose for pictures: full, shoulders up, and head shots. I need to learn how not to freeze, or run away, or worry about how my chin looks. I need to learn which is my better side, how to smile so my chubby cheeks don't make my eyes disappear, or whether to grin, or smile, or what. I also need help with hair and makeup, how to accentuate what is good, bring out the hazel in my eyes and that weird grey ring, and to camouflage what's not so telegenic. How to stand so I look leaner - but please, not with that arm akimbo, leg out, pageant pose that EVERY one seems to be doing.

All so I can ultimately sit for a formal portrait that looks like me – one where I’m not self conscious, that I’m proud of, that doesn’t make me look weird, that will be “timeless” and that gets a glimpse of the glimmer of the self-confident person that is buried deep down in me somewhere.

Something so the kids remember who I was.

So there’s a photo for “the occasion,” if there’s one ever needed.

So I can go up on the wall at my parents' -- and feel like I belong there as part of my beautiful family.

Photo of the Day: Camera Envy?

The Mercantile, Hurricane, Utah, December 2012

It was really hard to walk away from these. I love the ease of digital, but actually holding these old beauties made me miss my old Pentax, the tactile tension of trying to load a roll of film, and having to rationalize the costs of film, processing, and prints, not to mention the smell of the darkroom chemicals.

Camera Shy: A Ditty about Privacy

Why hello there, Mr. Shutter Fly:

I have to you, of your camera, I am shy.

Your point and shoot--snap, click, click,
Is oddly scary to this chick.

Please, oh please, respect my fright,
To protect my image, it is my right.

Do not tag or tweet, share or post
On your wall, or use to boast,
My face or image in anyway
Without written permission or my say.

Old-fashioned it may seem to you to be,
Manners still have a place in the 21st century.

Stop to think about these things, please,
Before I confront you with legalese.

For silly as it may seem to you,
Asking first is the thing to do.

And if I do say no to you,
('cause within my right it is to sue),

I hope you still will respect me, please.
Do not call me names, or "gently" tease.
Do not offer to blur or crop.
Do me a favor; don’t take the shot.

Take your camera lens and zoom,
Away from me -- into the next room.

For of your camera, I am shy.
Those pictures of me? They make me cry.

My oh, so sad attempts at poetry are not a sudden embrace of a new writing style for the blog. I don't know why I decided to process a recent incident in this manner. Some of the rhymes got stuck in my brain and this started to come out.

It was written in response to a photo of me, now removed, on Twitter that I found after dining in an establishment with a group of colleagues. I contacted the proprietor and they took it down. If they had asked first, I still wouldn't have agreed to be in the picture, or for it to be posted. Even if they hadn't shown my face. I let a few of my colleagues know what had happened, and they too didn't want to be photographed and were glad I pushed the issue.

It used to be that right to personal privacy was a given. Now you are looked at oddly when you insist upon it.

Lest you think this is a case of the "pot/kettle/black," if I post pictures of people on this blog/other social outlets, I do try and get some permission first, and/or use the handle/pseudonym/moniker of their choosing. I know that some of my friends are annoyed at how often they appear on the blog, for example. With the nieces and nephews, I do need to check in with their parents more, esp. as they are getting older and can have more of a say on how often they appear here.

I do find the irony in me complaining about privacy when I am a database content person/fund raiser and I'm in and out of people's personal data all day. HOWEVER, I do not disseminate that data, nor do I sell it. There are privacy laws in effect - on the institutional, state, and federal level regarding staff, students, and donors that will not, and should not, be breached. Because some of the students are minors, privacy rules are even more strictly enforced. However, we are more and more having to teach them about personal privacy boundaries, as they use the Internet and social media outlets to contact friends and family around the world.

Sadly, stalking, cyber-stalking, identity theft, and other violent crimes are a reality today, and have hit closer to home than one likes to admit. There has been, and continues to be, an erosion in basic civility. Unfortunately, the laws that protect your personal and online right to privacy have not caught up with the ever changing cyber situation.

No one else is going to stand up for you like you. Vigilance doesn't have to be debilitating. You just have to be aware and protect your own right to privacy.

That being said. If I've posted a picture of you here, without your permission, I do apologize and will retroactively move to remove/replace/change the identifier to protect your privacy.

Farewell Old Friend, Farewell

Since the inception of this blog, the majority of the photos featured here were taken by a digital Nikon Coolpix I think I received for Christmas in 2007. It accompanied me on cross country trips, commuting jaunts to and from work, documenting the beautiful and mundane, the sublime and the ridiculous.

We had our issues, this camera and me. Although I loved the ease of point and shoot, the ability to change from color to black and white, and the ability to pull it out of my pocket on a whim, it took too long for it to take a second photo, recover after a flash, and I never did figure out how to keep it from going to "sleep" so fast. I did love the macro and ability to take video on the same device as stills, but it never seems to shoot/save to the card, and I long, nay pine, for the ability to focus at will.

Alas, a SLR is out of the budget for the time being, not to mention too heavy to carry around in my pocket. I selected my most recent cell phone for its QWERTY keyboard and not its photographic qualities. Unfortunately, it's all I have left. A cellphone and my dreams of a compact, lightweight, pocket-sided affordable SLR.

My poor Coolpix had been suffering in recent years. The battery door and card door had been chipped for a while, and to keep them from flying open, I had liberally applied duct tape, packing tape, or painters tape to the frame at any given time. There have been a handful of incidents that I call the RED SCREEN OF DEATH, where the lens froze and wouldn't move, causing the whole system to be paralyzed. After some sickenly horrid moments, with prying off the tape, forcing open the battery chamber, and many prayers, the system came back on board and the photos were saved. The thing was battered though, and looked, for a better word, ghetto.

Until yesterday..

Yesterday was the end. (*sniff*)

I was attempting to photograph the August crafting projects, when all of a sudden it slipped off the counter and bounced on the floor. I wasn't too alarmed. I have dropped it before. This time, though, I got the RED SCREEN OF DEATH. Closer examination showed that the lens was dented, off center, and it looks like a fracture appeared in the aperture either due to that fall or me attempting to "tap" the metal into shape.

Time once was, you could open a device and actually figure out how to put Humpty Dumpty back together again. This was not that time. It didn't help that tiny pieces started to fall out of the interior of the camera as I pried the back off.

Here lies the carcass of my Nikon Coolpix, as recorded by the cell phone camera. If you look carefully, you can see how the lens is already looking heavenward.

Nikon Coolpix Christmas 2007-September 2011
Farewell Old Friend