The Wild (Mid)west Adventures of the Shushing Librarian - Part 2

The next day dawned early, and we were ready to hit the road with our awesome rental – a 2010 Electric Glide Ultra Classic Harley Davidson courtesy of Dillon Brothers (thanks Dan!).

It was love at first sight.

“It’s beautiful and blue!” It was quickly nicknamed Ol’ Blue by B.We dismissed the predicted rain showers and grabbed our helmets, rain suits, and essentials, pointing the bike west towards Columbus to see some of C’s family before heading to the big tractor pull that night.

(You read that right. Big. Tractor. Pull. YEEHAW!)

We stopped in the don’t-blink-an-eye-or-you-will-miss-it town of Cornlea (population 40 people!) to surprise C’s Uncle Lee at his newly purchased tavern and to grab some lunch.

Cheeseburgers $3.25
Fried mushrooms $2.00
The splurge of the day?
Shrimp Basket with homemade macaroni salad ONLY $5.50!

After lunch, we stopped by to see C’s Grandma, who would have loved to have jumped on the Harley for a quick spin but the high temperatures, topping close to 95 degrees, kept her inside. After a quick kiss and hug goodbye to Grandma, we were off to Erv’s (C’s dad) where we would park the bike for the night and ride together to the big tractor pull in Wisner, NE.

At that time, Erv’s tractor, Wild Fire, was currently holding the number one position in points (and ended up winning the season) in the Light SS category of the Outlaw Truck and Tractor Pulling Association. Wild Fire is pretty famous in these parts, so I felt privileged that I was able to climb aboard the green machine. (Editor's note: Seriously, it's famous. Google "Wild Fire+tractor," and there are YouTube videos!)The goal of tractor pulling is to pull a heavy sled as far as possible. We sat at the 300 yard line, which is a pretty respectable distance, to cheer onWild Fire.One thing that I quickly learned is that tractor pulls are LOUD, and a bit dirty from the diesel fumes and flying dirt. B thinks tractor pulls are the one of the reasons for our ozone problems!Boy, that machine can go! C’s brother, Jesse, drove Wild Fire 297.22 yards. I think I will stick with something more my size.After a long, sweaty evening at the tractor pull, we headed back to C’s dad’s house for hot showers (it was a filthy day) and some much needed shut eye. But before we crawled into the John Deer sheets, I was asked to judge a contest that C’s dad and his fiancee, Jolene, have going between them – who has found the longest turkey beard!This does not come as a surprise to me knowing that C’s dad loves to hunt and has quite the gun collection. Here is B showing off some of Erv’s prized shotguns (which go nicely with B’s camouflage shorts, don’t you think?)
Stay tuned for the next installment of my Wild (Mid)West Adventures with C & B.

Zipping through Zion

Since we were so close to the National Park, J and I continued north toward Zion. Thanks to his handy Parks Pass and i.d., we were able to get in with no entrance fee. For those not fit enough, or equipped to hike, Zion has lovely roads that you may traverse by vehicle to see the splendor of the peaks. Good for more guerrilla photography.

It would have been lovely to hike, but alas, look at all the snow up here. Remember those flipflops? Too cold for the toesies and not good for ankles.

Although beautiful in Zion, it was approaching lunch time and (*ahem*) nature was calling. Since it was New Year's, all the restrooms in the Park were closed for the season and the lodges were full of those touristy types. We headed back down to Springdale for victuals and facilities.


J remembered a greasy spoon in town that was great, so we headed there. Much to his dismay, the much loved Bumbleberry Restaurant has been taken over by new management, remodelled, and renamed as Wildcat Willies Ranch Grill & Saloon. Neither of us were very impressed, and judging by all the comments by people who had been to town before, the previous incarnation is going to be missed, no matter the waitstaff's and management's pride in recuping investments on the new version so quickly.

The Bumbleberry Inn has pictures of what the old restaurant looked like. That was charming. Being confronted with this was not.

Do I really want to be looking at a vulture as I eat my burger and fries? I don't think so!

On the way up to Grafton and Springdale, we passed various small towns, including Hurricane. You have to hear the Southern Utah accent to know that it is not pronounced like the storm, but Hurr-i-kun. Strange people, these Utes.

Southern Utah is also home to the largest populations of Virgins on Earth.

Residents of Virgin, Utah ... Because of the Virgin River people!

(Who thought putting cherries on this sign was a good idea?)

The town may be small, but they have High Speed Internet AND Virgin Goods.

(I guess they are saving the Good Virgins for the Apocalypse?)

Way to pose bro! If we didn't know you had two kids, we'd be worried about your Virginal aspirations.

We still had half the day ahead of us, so we maturely thought we should leave the Vestals of Virgin and head down the mountains before we were run out of town. Next stop ... Silver Reef and Arizona.